Tumblr Mouse Cursors
I´m a sir

rupsidaisy:

pizzaforpresident:

firemen:

my follower count is my birth year

did you know jesus personally?

slam DUNKED

(via ifimogen)

officialunitedstates:

"What does the chef recommend?"

"Sir, this is a mcdonalds"

(via satitsfied)

clientsfromhell:

Client: Do you do lemonade?

Me: Do we do… lemonade?

Client: Yes, I was told you do that here.

Me: I’m sorry, this is a graphics and print shop.

Client: I know that. I’m not an idiot. 

Me: I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to -  

Client: Look If you can’t lemonade these papers for me then I’ll go somewhere else!

Me: Do you mean… laminate?

(via joshpeck)

eatpussylivehappy:

*licks your pussy then goes to your parents and yells*

WHO THE FUCK MADE THIS?

WAS IT YOU?

THIS SHIT GOOD!!

(via satitsfied)

theyre:

Make fun of your baby for shitting itself

(via satitsfied)

nico-diangelcakes:

nico-diangelcakes:

So i have this giant pencil right

image

I think we all know where this is going.

image

the amount of people saying that they were expecting me to shove it up my ass is alarming

(Source: nicodiangelzo, via moonwalksaway)

vvankinq:

I scrolled to the bottom for an explanation but I’m still confused

(Source: iraffiruse, via cristynchen)

Timestamp: 1407139410

vvankinq:

I scrolled to the bottom for an explanation but I’m still confused

(Source: iraffiruse, via cristynchen)

thisshitfunny:

company gm: so what are your skills or talents 

me: 

image

company gm: wooooo shit gotdamn boi 

(via onlylolgifs)

staff:

fake-mermaid:

i’m so sorry but if you have “works at tumblr” on your facebook profile no hard feelings man but stay as far away from me as u possibly can

rude

(via dutchster)

meatloves:

the cucumber saga

(via dutchster)

Timestamp: 1407021697

meatloves:

the cucumber saga

(via dutchster)

(Source: autophagie, via rlmjob)

So excited I enrolled in night classes. What could go wrong?

mikeyisacunt:

bent-duck:

sylvia-socioplath:

image

christ

girl on the left is physically repelled from him

(via sniffing)

orangesage:

If you ever hate or are embarrassed by the Naruto fandom, just remember it didn’t join in an alliance with One Piece and Bleach and make something embarrassing like SuperWhoLock.

(via faygo-fuckyourself)

bruinsstrong:

This story keeps on getting better and better

(via mexic-anus)

Timestamp: 1406874506

bruinsstrong:

This story keeps on getting better and better

(via mexic-anus)